Our social lives, it seems, can now be divided into those occasions that require a ‘dress code’ - predictably, weddings, funerals (although even then…), rugby dinners, office Christmas parties….and those that don’t. Casual dressing dominates and luxury has been redefined by cashmere tracksuits and premium trainers: the act of dressing up to go out can seem old school, or at least your efforts should be discretely hidden behind nonchalent athleisure-wear.

But how you think about, and present yourself for all special occasions has profound psychological benefits and can contribute to self-esteem, confidence, and overall mental well-being. Clothing can influence mood, behaviour, and self-perception - technically known as enclothed cognition. When we put effort into dressing for a social occasion, we are not just changing our outward appearance; we are signalling to ourselves that the moment matters. It also offers your companions a sense that the event - however ‘casual’ - is an occasion, and their company is important to you.

Not only your companions, actually. Historically, dressing up for going out was about more than just personal presentation - it was a way of showing reverence for the experience. Restaurants and cultural institutions are spaces worthy of effort and attention, and historically formality of dress reflected an appreciation for the craft of the chef, the harmony of the decor, the collective effort front of house. What the customer actually wears - signifying how they view the occasion - is very much part of our story and can affect everyone in the moment. No one is suggesting black tie is mandatory any more, although it’s damn fun if you want to project complete confidence and also delightfully naughty if unexpected. Since more casual clothing comes with a range of social baggage: each choice is a a marker of how hip, flush, energetic, rural or experimental you are, it can be easier to swerve anything that indicates actual……consideration: “Oh this? I’ve had it for ages”.

While we’re all about democratisation, and shudder at the thought of a strict dress code - there is always something special about an admiring glance at a guest’s outfit, a sense that they have chosen to dress in just that way to honour the evening. After all, the staff are wearing their own dress code, the flowers are fresh, the tables are clean, napkins folded and the glasses polished: self-care of our surroundings also extends to ourselves. Choosing an outfit that makes you feel confident and polished can serve as a form of respect; it sends a message to yourself that you are worthy of care and attention. And not just to yourself - trust us on this - it sends a message to those welcoming you, serving you, cooking for you, that you are taking pride in the occasion. If everyone in your party has made that conscious choice, it’s going to bring a sense of shared enthusiasm and collective appreciation for the occasion. When everyone makes an effort, the atmosphere feels more festive and special, reinforcing a sense of belonging and shared joy. There is a simple pleasure in celebrating the smaller moments in life by bringing a touch of elegance and intentionality to them.

It doesn’t have to be a milestone event; the act of dressing up is less about impressing others and more about elevating our own experiences. So next time you’re heading out for dinner, look in the mirror and (sorry, CoCo Chanel!) add one thing to your outfit that makes you feel elegant and that you don’t usually wear. Not for anyone else, but for you.